


Randomly Accessed Memories

by SamuelJames



Category: Star Trek (2009)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-09
Updated: 2010-03-09
Packaged: 2017-11-01 17:00:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/359186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamuelJames/pseuds/SamuelJames
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pike is able to help Jim in a way he never expected</p>
            </blockquote>





	Randomly Accessed Memories

**Author's Note:**

> Title: Randomly Accessed Memories  
> Characters: Chris Pike and Jim Kirk  
> Rating: PG  
> Summary: Pike is able to help Jim in a way he never expected  
> Notes: Prompt was Jim & Pike, memory keepers  
> Disclaimer: Star Trek is the property of its creators. No copyright infringement is intended.  
> Archiving Information: Please do not archive elsewhere on the net.

Jim is brilliant but stubborn and the reverse psychology that got him into Starfleet is not a trick that Chris Pike has managed to repeat. He knows it's approaching the anniversary of the Kelvin's destruction but Jim has got to learn that he cannot keep disrupting classes. Despite the fact that he could probably pass any exam it's not fair on his instructors or his fellow students. He sits back in his chair and looks at Jim who has so far refused to say anything. Chris tries to wait him out but eventually has to dismiss Jim to attend a meeting.

Jim smirks triumphantly but it only lasts a moment. He knows he's behaving childishly but he's not about to let his guard down just because Pike got him into Starfleet. He doesn't owe anyone anything. The dreams have started again as they always do in the run up to his birthday. His mom tried, really she did but her smile never reached her eyes. His birthdays have always been more about mourning than celebration. After leaving Pike's office he heads off campus to a bar. Perhaps enough alcohol will provide him with a dreamless sleep.

Chris goes to Jim's room after his meeting but gets no answer. He's somewhat relieved since he doesn't know what he would have said. He returns to his own room and calls up his dissertation on the Kelvin. Jim cannot help the circumstances in which he was born but it’s meant that he’s never been Jim Kirk in his own right. He’s been George and Winona’s son, expected to be as brilliant as them. For others he’s been the tragic child, a symbol of hope born in a disaster situation. Chris is not in the mood for company, he also heads off campus unknowingly choosing the same bar as Jim. When he enters the bar Jim sees him and slips out a second door. An opportunity to connect is missed.

The following morning Chris is a little more hungover than he expected. Jim catches him before he’s had a chance to take anything and he ends up snapping at him.

A hurt look flashes through Jim’s eyes and then he hides it quickly. “I wanted to apologise for being childish yesterday. I will not disrupt Taylor’s class no matter how boring it might be.”

“Sorry, Jim, pounding headache. I appreciate the apology. Taylor might appreciate it more. Being on the command track is not just about knowledge. I’m not saying be fake but a huge part of it is networking, building a rapport with people. In simulations you’re great, can inspire a team but there will always be superior officers to impress. I’d write you a recommendation in a heartbeat but would anyone else?”

Jim doesn’t answer, he’s always been brutally honest in his opinions and the thought of schmoozing doesn’t sit well with him. “I hate the idea of fake niceness but I guess I can manage polite.”

“Think of it as being responsible for your future career.”

Jim nods, “can I go?”

“Sure, you came to me. Remember?”

As Jim’s walking away Pike stops him, “it’s your birthday next week.” Jim just looks at him. “I did my dissertation on the Kelvin you know. Your mother gave me permission to access some of their personal logs.”

“Can I hear them?” He knows there must be recordings from his father’s various posts but had never thought he could access them. 

Chris hadn’t used them in his dissertation but kept them all the same, couldn’t bring himself to delete his copies of the files. He calls them up for Jim and steps back giving the illusion of privacy. Jim plays the first one.

_Personal log of Mr and Mrs Kirk, the happiest parents in the world. Sam slept through the night for the first time._

_\- -  
Personal log of George Kirk. Have been assigned to the Kelvin and will serve under Captain Robau. Winona was posted there too so we’re happy._

_\- -  
Winona Kirk's personal log. I love my husband, he was playing with Sam today, the two of them sitting on the floor. I was so nervous before Sam was born but we can do this. We’re good at this parenting thing._

_\- -  
George Kirk, personal log. Off shift today, Sam was a little unwell but nothing serious._

_\- -  
George Kirk's proud personal log. I’m going to be a dad again. A brother or sister for Sam. Can’t wait._

Jim doesn't click the next file. “There’s a holovid of them with Sam which I never watched because he got to know my dad and I didn’t. I’ve never heard my mom that happy before. They seemed so in love.”

“They were. They were happy about you too. Your can hear it in his voice. He made sure your mother got off the ship, made sure both of you were safe. Your mom was about to call you Tiberius but she said he picked your name.”

Jim wipes away a tear that Pike pretends he doesn’t notice.

“It’s okay to miss him, to resent Sam a little even if it’s not logical.”

“Other people have lost their parents. I should be able to handle it.”

“You will if you actually deal with it instead of acting out."

Jim wants to let go, break down here but that’s not him. He takes a few deep breaths to compose himself. “I’ll be fine.”

Chris isn’t sure if this is a breakthrough or a backwards step. “I’ll send you copies of the files. There are a few more on there.”

“Thank you.”

Jim holds it together till he reaches his room and then lets the tears fall. He’s angry at Pike for getting to him like this but so thankful that he listened to those files. He’ll probably play them over and over but he could never get sick of hearing his dad’s voice and how happy he’d been about becoming a father again. He hears the bleep of his communicator and opens the files. Some of them make him cry again and two make him laugh as his parents talk over one another. He doesn’t have any memories of his father but at least now he has something.


End file.
